teenager; boise lifestyle photographer
Last week Jay turned thirteen. This week he had his braces put on and when I saw him walk out of the orthodontist’s office it hit me like a load of bricks…he’s a teenager. The realization that this day would come has been coming to me steadily for the past three years with the changing moods, his increasing desire for independence and mostly his reminding me, daily, that he’s getting older. But now it’s here…a full-fledged teenager. He rolls his eyes when I say that and scolds me for making a big deal. But then in the next breath says “I’ll bet you never thought this day would come.” My reply, “I knew it would come but just not SO fast!” Because, if the truth were told, I’m not ready. It occurred to me yesterday, that I am slowly losing control and my ability to mold him. I still have some, but it’s decreasing every day as peer pressure builds and I become more of an annoyance in his eyes. Disciplining is hard, but I am so thankful I had the strength to do it when he was young, because if I were to start now, I’d be toast! Don’t get me wrong, I still try to impose discipline but it’s a tight-rope act. As he pulls away, I find I have to ease the tension on the rope a little and let him…its scares me and I desperately want to hang on tight.
Every now and then he comes back for a hug, conversation, and even some advice. But more and more, I find that he’s become the teacher and I the student. He’s so smart! …and kind and funny…and I see that he is going to grow up to be a great man, husband & father. We just need to make it to the other side…yes “we” because like it or not, I am on this journey with him, even if I have to watch from the side.
And SOMEtimes I even get a glimpse of my little boy. (Don’t tell him I told you that) Ah yes, this is going to be quite the ride!